JOY – how to say yes to pleasure

Joy is a very strong emotion, in fact it is so strong, that when you feel it, your body reacts to it instinctively. You can recognise joy in a humans face, voice and body, no matter where you are on this beautiful planet.

Unfortunately we have been conditioned to surpress our own reflexes so maybe the purest expression of Joy can be found in a Child. It can be so overcome by Joy, that it will move and sound through it`s entire body and it will most surely make you feel Joy when you see it.

So what happens to joy when as the years pass? How does joy grow up?

I believe we now call it happiness. Learning to make our reactions, our expressions more adequate, we numb our perception and we numb our expression. Happiness is different, simply because it is an emotion that is filtered through our mind. It does not cause a reflex, it is controlled by thought, and it´s expression is a little more adequate for our environment, a little more silent, a little less apparent, a little less silly.

Again I wonder, what happened to joy? How have we gone from crazy Joyful to going through life with almost no expression of Joy at all?

Joy is ecstasy. Joy is lust. Joy is passion.

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Ecstasy, lust and passion. Scandalous. Dangerous! And surely sexual.

So have we buried our Joy in the fear of appearing too lustful, too ecstatic, too passionate and hence sexual? I am afraid we might have.

I would go as far as to say, we have chained the expression of Joy to sexuality, only here allowing ecstasy, lust and passion in our lives. Only in our sexuality do we give in to the physical reflex that Joy induces, here it is allowed, here it is expressed.

Yes, Joy is sexy. Joy is life affirming. It is good, it is powerful and it is fun!

It is sometimes released from the bedroom to find its expression in movement on the dance floor. Yet here we have many witnesses and again it is difficult for many to expose, to show, to share passion, lust, ecstasy through voice and body. Even here we try and hide, control, surpress this true, this powerful expression of life. But we come a little closer and the more we dance, the more aware we become of this beautiful , exhilarating force, the more we can allow it and feel really, really good.

It is good to dance, it is good to express, it is good to allow yourself and others to see you in this state of ecstatic pleasure, free from guilt and shame and free from the idea that this power is to remain a closeted secret.

Joy is a natural emotion to us all, it can be triggered easily, it is nothing we need to learn or achieve, it is already in us just as our rage and our sadness.

We can simply allow it to express itself, so just by letting go, this powerful force will fill our entire being and we can for a moment let go of all the ideas of shame and that are keeping us surpressed and controlled. We can say yes to life and all its lustful pleasures, all ist ecstasy.

All expressions of Joy are beautiful, when you witness one, it makes you joyful. Joy is easy to share, it is natural and it is healing. It is the ultimate counterweight to all that is serious and heavy in our lives, to all that makes us sad and weary. And it is already here. In all of us, all the time. Its only effort is effortlessness, its only limitation is control.

So lets let ourselves get intoxicated by Joy, lets allow ourselves to get carried away, lets actively seek for opportunities to do so!

Let us dance and celebrate more, let us enjoy Joy more, let us allow our bodies to express Lust by allowing those pleasure sounds whenever you feel to. Allow the laughter to be wild and free, allow the smile to spread all over your face and body, wherever you are. Do the happy dance when you feel to. Always. Allow your Joy to move you, to move through you, allow it to relieve your pain, to heal your sorrow and to uplift and brighten your spirit.

It’s Summertime, allow yourself to dance, to love, to celebrate and to enJoy!


With love


Eliza Charu Hermsdorf

Co-Founder of DIMA Mallorca, A Centre for Conscious Living

Mediator and Conflict counselor at MediateBerlin